I'm going to write about Dates #7, 8 and 9 tonight because believe it or not, they all happened in the one day. I don't know what I was thinking! I was exhausted by the end of it and vowed never to do it again. And in between times I was working and having a really busy day!
I am going to refer to Date #7 as "Mr. Nice Guy" because that's exactly what he was. And this is where I started to get a little confused with myself but I'll explain that later.
Date #7 truly was a nice guy. South African, polite, respectful, not bad looking. Insisted he buy me coffee (I have a lot of coffee dates!) It was a very pleasant time, he talked about his experience in New Zealand, his love for motorbikes and friends he'd made who also loved motorbikes and offroad motorbiking (okay - not the correct name but this is a topic that I know absolutely nothing about). I really couldn't relate to much of that and I can't really remember talking about anything much that I related to. But I liked him. Just that there was no spark.
And so this is when I started to wonder about myself. Was chemistry or spark something that was there in the beginning (and can grow) or is it possible to not really have that spark and it grows as you get to know a person? These were the questions that had me hesitating in contacting Mr. Nice Guy to say thank you (which would be followed [usually] by an invitation to go out again by him if he were interested). And then my hesitation dragged on too long and the moment had passed. I probably should have gone on a 2nd date to see whether 1st date nerves may have got in the way of chemistry (if he wanted to that is). But perhaps it was because of the next date I had that evening that I didn't make as much of an effort as perhaps I should have.
I never heard from Mr. Nice Guy again, but I did try and set him up with an acquaintance - unfortunately she had the exact same experience as me. Such a nice guy she saw him a 2nd time, but no spark so just remained friends. Why do we love a guy with a little bit of an edge? Doesn't have to be a bad boy but perhaps a je ne sais qoi?
I am going to refer to Date #7 as "Mr. Nice Guy" because that's exactly what he was. And this is where I started to get a little confused with myself but I'll explain that later.
Date #7 truly was a nice guy. South African, polite, respectful, not bad looking. Insisted he buy me coffee (I have a lot of coffee dates!) It was a very pleasant time, he talked about his experience in New Zealand, his love for motorbikes and friends he'd made who also loved motorbikes and offroad motorbiking (okay - not the correct name but this is a topic that I know absolutely nothing about). I really couldn't relate to much of that and I can't really remember talking about anything much that I related to. But I liked him. Just that there was no spark.
And so this is when I started to wonder about myself. Was chemistry or spark something that was there in the beginning (and can grow) or is it possible to not really have that spark and it grows as you get to know a person? These were the questions that had me hesitating in contacting Mr. Nice Guy to say thank you (which would be followed [usually] by an invitation to go out again by him if he were interested). And then my hesitation dragged on too long and the moment had passed. I probably should have gone on a 2nd date to see whether 1st date nerves may have got in the way of chemistry (if he wanted to that is). But perhaps it was because of the next date I had that evening that I didn't make as much of an effort as perhaps I should have.
I never heard from Mr. Nice Guy again, but I did try and set him up with an acquaintance - unfortunately she had the exact same experience as me. Such a nice guy she saw him a 2nd time, but no spark so just remained friends. Why do we love a guy with a little bit of an edge? Doesn't have to be a bad boy but perhaps a je ne sais qoi?
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