It took me a little while to get over Mr. Yummy Date #3 and our 6-week romance. I missed him. I couldn't understand why a combination of chemistry, friendship and intimacy wouldn't work for him... so I took a few months off from the dating scene to recover from my bruised heart and wounded pride (and dating disillusionment).
While I never fully recovered from the disillusionment, my heart and pride did and I decided to give it another shot. I had by now turned to the dating website "Find Someone".
I was not quick to meet Date #4. We chatted online for quite some time before it turned to texts and phonecalls. I was reluctant to get back into dating again but eventually curiosity got the better of me. Date #4 was 12mths post marriage breakup. I can't remember now how long the marriage was - maybe 10years? - but he had kids and she had one day informed him she had met someone and wanted him to move out. The shock was so devastating, as you can imagine. And then just a few months ago his father had passed away so he was an emotional wreck in some respects and crying most days.
For some obscure reason I thought that a date would be a great idea. And here was where I learned the lesson "make sure he's over his ex". That first date we had a drink at the pub followed by a light meal, a movie and more drinks. I enjoyed his company but in hindsight I think I had become a sounding board come counsellor as he all but cried into his beer. I said to him that I thought he was not ready for dating but I was certainly happy to be his friend.
The problem was the friendship part. He came over to my house one evening (by invitation - I know, big no-no!) with bottle of wine and pizza and I had supplied the dvd.
The conversation did not centre around his ex or the breakup or even his kids, but his interests. He talked about his passion for remote control airplanes down to the details of how the remote control part actually works. He talked about his interest in technology (phones, computers etc). I'm sure sport was thrown in there at some point. Suffice to say we had nothing in common at all. I'm very much a girly-girl and airplanes, technology and sport don't spin my wheels...
This was followed by a dvd (my unfortunate choice - the unfortunate choice I always make when trying to please the guest and end up with a dud movie). It was a terrible attempt at a thriller - you know, the ones that say thriller on the box and then you find out that it's actually a dreary drama? He fell asleep. It was very awkward. Eventually I suggested that maybe we called it a night...
I felt very very bad for calling it quits on our "friendship" but I knew that I was only in it not for myself but to be a support to him and I just couldn't shoulder that.
Thus ended Date #4 with Mr. Beer-Crier (shouldn't make fun of him though - poor guy).
While I never fully recovered from the disillusionment, my heart and pride did and I decided to give it another shot. I had by now turned to the dating website "Find Someone".
I was not quick to meet Date #4. We chatted online for quite some time before it turned to texts and phonecalls. I was reluctant to get back into dating again but eventually curiosity got the better of me. Date #4 was 12mths post marriage breakup. I can't remember now how long the marriage was - maybe 10years? - but he had kids and she had one day informed him she had met someone and wanted him to move out. The shock was so devastating, as you can imagine. And then just a few months ago his father had passed away so he was an emotional wreck in some respects and crying most days.
For some obscure reason I thought that a date would be a great idea. And here was where I learned the lesson "make sure he's over his ex". That first date we had a drink at the pub followed by a light meal, a movie and more drinks. I enjoyed his company but in hindsight I think I had become a sounding board come counsellor as he all but cried into his beer. I said to him that I thought he was not ready for dating but I was certainly happy to be his friend.
The problem was the friendship part. He came over to my house one evening (by invitation - I know, big no-no!) with bottle of wine and pizza and I had supplied the dvd.
The conversation did not centre around his ex or the breakup or even his kids, but his interests. He talked about his passion for remote control airplanes down to the details of how the remote control part actually works. He talked about his interest in technology (phones, computers etc). I'm sure sport was thrown in there at some point. Suffice to say we had nothing in common at all. I'm very much a girly-girl and airplanes, technology and sport don't spin my wheels...
This was followed by a dvd (my unfortunate choice - the unfortunate choice I always make when trying to please the guest and end up with a dud movie). It was a terrible attempt at a thriller - you know, the ones that say thriller on the box and then you find out that it's actually a dreary drama? He fell asleep. It was very awkward. Eventually I suggested that maybe we called it a night...
I felt very very bad for calling it quits on our "friendship" but I knew that I was only in it not for myself but to be a support to him and I just couldn't shoulder that.
Thus ended Date #4 with Mr. Beer-Crier (shouldn't make fun of him though - poor guy).
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ReplyDeleteLoving your blog - thank you for sharing - can't wait to read more =)
ReplyDeleteThanks settlepetal! What part of the world are you from? Encouraging to get your comment :) Wondered if I was talking to myself. Entertained the idea of holding a competition to see who could guess which date would end up with the result of my falling in-love!!! (If any).. But thought that maybe I was getting a bit crazy :)
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