Monday, 5 December 2011

Date #1 'Scott'

We will call Date #1 Scott (Scott-no-kids).  Scott and I agreed to meet after several messages on the dating website "Plenty of Fish."  I found him sitting outside waiting for me at a cafe on the North Shore looking as nervous as I felt.  He offered to pay for my coffee and I accepted. We sat in the sun and talked about our lives and I thought he was very handsome when he smiled.  Most of our conversation was about our marriage breakups and subsequent journeys recovering from that.  Not the best topic for a first date but I was a rookie.  It ended well, we messaged again and found ourselves on a 2nd date that involved coffee, a walk on the beach and a drive in the countryside.  I discovered that Scott wasn't entirely ready for a relationship and wanted to be friends first.  He also never wanted to have kids (which I can't relate to) and announced when the car came to a stop that he wasn't sure he could date someone who had kids.

After such a pleasant time this was a huge disappointment and I later sent him a message saying that I thought it was best if we left it at that.  My son comes as a package with me and his uncertainty about whether he could embrace that wasn't a risk I wanted to take in terms of my heart.

Much, much later I met up again with Scott for a friendly drink but we had very little to talk about and it was clear that there was no connection there.

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